Up and down

It has been an interesting long weekend. And I'm not talking about the Olympics - I'll leave that for some deeper discussions at a later date. 


The "interesting" aspect has been to do with inner stretching - how far "apart" can I go in thought, body-expression, soulful yearning and spiritual realm, erotic and manifesting "magic", bringing "Heaven to Earth" and expanded healing, until "I" either burst into pieces or find myself stepping through the veil of the current matrix?

In one of the versions of Chaos Theory - dealing with the deterministic (or not) nature of dynamical systems and their unpredictability - it is proposed that a relatively minute amount of chaos is necessary in all cosmic systems. Chaos provides a "force-against" - small enough not to be noticeable in most cases, but powerful enough to grow into a force which will overcome deeply-laid stable patterns and lead to unpredictable renewal or transformation.


When I started reading about Chaos theory just over 15 years ago, I was struck by the similarity to the Luciferian legend that we read about in Revelation; as though the way that the foremost archangel (Lucifer) - bearer of Divine Light - had "suddenly" turned "devil/monster" and amassed a huge following which must be destroyed (by Michael) or banished to Earth, was all minutely coded into the Divine Plan.


Those first incursions into how chaos "works" have now come into their own in my life, this summer 2012. 


At present, everything I've ever believed in, felt, thought about, absorbed from ancestors, relatives, societies I've been living in,  everything I've perceived that I've experienced etc (and much more!) is now "up for grabs" at levels which make me feel extremely uncomfortable - as well as curious, excited, yearning, afraid, passionate, wanting to hide, ready to open! 

I don't think the sexual connotations here are a co-incidence - the way we are expanding from our ordinary experiences of intimacy to a level which is unfathomable from an adolescent perspective, is a magnificent metaphor.


Maybe it's more than a metaphor. 


Maybe the Luciferian legend is showing us that the integration of what seems like destructive passion completely into our Ascension practices, is actually divinely necessary if we wish to avoid having to go through the cosmic veil of hellish suffering again and again.

More to come on this!!